Reframing – how to take charge of how you feel

Greetings All:

I have been busy with my practice, literally changing and saving lives, and I have also been learning the world of Twitter. I have found some wonderful people on Twitter, and though I was reluctant to get started with another social networking venue, it has been fun and rewarding. You can follow me here: @KarlZimmerIII.

Now, back to the topic of this post.  We all hear the reports by the various media about how awful things are with our economy.  We hear the reports about unemployment, mammoth companies like GM and GE turning into fractions of their former selves, and the financial markets at their lowest levels in several decades.  So with all that bad news, is it any wonder that we all feel so awful?

One simple solution is to not listen to the news, to just ignore all that negative press.  We could all turn off the news and watch some good old sitcoms in syndication or use our cable systems’ “on demand” feature to watch funny  movies.  We could, and that might not be such a bad idea.  Adults laugh about one tenth as often as children do, so should we even wonder why we are stressed and tired most of the time?  I think we know the answer to that, but perhaps we don’t know what to do about it.

In addition to the simple solution above, which will actually help your state of mind a great deal, here is another proven method for improving one’s mental state.  It is called “reframing,” and it is a powerful process you may have done before without even knowing it.  Remember the description of an optimist being one who sees the glass half-full and a pessimist being one who sees the glass half-empty?  Well, that is simply a reframe.  The glass has the same amount of liquid, but one description seems more positive than the other.

How does that apply to our current economic situation and how we all feel about it?  Take the unemployment news as an example.  The most recent report was that unemployment reached 8.1%.  I won’t even address the tone of voice any given reporter used to convey that news, but just take the number itself.  That rate of unemployment, 8.1% ~ reframe ~ there is 91.9% employment!  Doesn’t that sound quite a bit better?

Another way to look at it is, if something around 4.5% is full employment (defined as, “natural unemployment  – everyone who wants to work is working; a non-accelerating inflationary growth rate), then eight percent unemployment doesn’t seem quite as awful.  Sure, for those who are losing their jobs, it feels awful at the time.  But, what if they find a job that is even better than the job they lost?  Would that be so awful?  Would they be able to find that job if they hadn’t lost their other job?  Is that a way of reframing the situation to create a better state of mind?  Yes, and when we are in a better frame of mind, we are better able to be creative and to find solutions to our current situations.  If we are stuck in the muck, it is hard to see beyond it.

Whatever you do, make sure you are finding time to relax, to have fun, and to create more positive outlooks.  Use any downtime you might have to create an empowering vision of your future, and then take steps to get there.  Remember the Serenity Prayer by Reinhold Niebuhr:

God Grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the Courage to change the things I can,
and the Wisdom to know the difference.

You are responsible for how you feel, so take charge. Go well, and get on with it!

Karl

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Happy 2009 and other positive beliefs!

Now that we are in the New Year, I thought I would share some observations and remind you that what you imagine, dream, and believe – you will achieve.

So, 2008 has ended, and we can all breathe a sigh of relief. It has been a difficult one for many of us, and yet I also find that it has been quite rewarding. If we were paying attention, we learned a great deal about ourselves and the world around us. A presupposition of NLP is that there is no failure, only feedback. No matter how bad things were, if we learned something that will serve us in the coming year, then we can feel good about the past year. For those who weren’t paying attention, follow what I am about to share with you and you just might have a wonderful 2009 anyway.

The news media and others kept bombarding us with negative news and doom and gloom. It got so bad, we believed it and actually made things worse. That is not to say that there weren’t some greedy and dishonest people who did unconscionable things. That is not to say that thousands didn’t lose their jobs. That is not to say that the housing market in many parts of the country didn’t suffer. What I do mean is that perhaps it didn’t have to be so bad. What would have happened if we hadn’t listened to the news and had still gone out and spent money (those of us who could have afforded it) rather than having been so fearful that we didn’t? Would as many companies have suffered so much? As a result, would as many people have lost their jobs? Did our belief in the terrible news result in a self-fulfilling prophecy?

We all know that it isn’t what happens to us that makes us successful but how we deal with what happens to us. I choose to believe that the world is full of magic – that most people are honest and compassionate and ultimately will do the right thing. I choose to believe that when things feel really bad, they will get better. I choose to believe that I am responsible for how I feel, for how my day goes, for how I treat others, and for my happiness. I choose to believe that when someone treats me with disrespect, it is about them and not me (because I know that I deserve respect). I choose to believe that 2009 will be a great year because I choose to make 2009 a great year.

Do you have a great day, or do you make it a great day? I suppose great days can just happen, but that is unlikely unless you believe you are going to have a great day, in which case your belief affects your actions, so you are making it a great day whether you know it or not. How do you make it a great day? Ask yourself, “How can I make today a great day?” Then take action on your answer. Begin 2009 by making it a great day, today, and do that every day for the next 27 days. If you forget a day, just pick back up the next day. Before you know it, you’ll be “having” great days, every day.

Make 2009 your best year, ever! Get on with it!

Karl

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A Promise ~ Yes We Can!

Hello All,

I seem to remember writing in another post about being particularly emotional, about not knowing why, but just knowing that tears were on the verge of flowing at any given moment, for seemingly no particular reason.  The past couple weeks have been very emotional, and I do know some of the reasons.  A dear friend with whom I worked for more than 20 years, though many years ago, passed within this time.  My daughter was in an accident (she is fine, thank you), during this time.  My father-in-law, whom I have known my entire life, passed during this time.  My mother is having an important, serious procedure.  I opened my new practice, during this time.

And then came November 5, 2008.   The world woke to a new day, a new time, a new beginning of such measure that we have not seen its kind until now.  And I watched and I cried, and I watched through the tears as the world rejoiced in a new America, an America that could be proud for finally looking past the color of someone’s skin and toward the possibility, toward the promise of a brighter future for all without regard for anything other than that they were human, that they were us.  I was touched by the fact that the dream of Martin Luther King Jr., the dream of all human kind has now become more than a glimmer of hope.  The light is shining brighter than ever, now.

I am excited by the possibility that this new beginning has to offer.  I know Barack Obama, those he surrounds himself with, and we have a filled agenda, and I also believe that as bad as things may be, there is great promise ahead, because even if we have further down to go, we can’t be that far from the bottom.  Things will begin to move in the other direction, soon.  The pendulum must begin to swing the other way, now.  And if we all believe that it will begin to get better, then it will.  We can make it so.

We must leave politics out of the equation.  This is not about left or right, Democrat or Republican.  They and we are all guilty of the mess we are in.  We must look past the blame and look toward the future.  And as long as we hold accountable those who promise us a change for the better, as long as we make sure that those in power, those who work for us, are not using faulty logic to emote votes for self-serving agendas, then we can all be proud of what we accomplish, because we will have done it together.

Today is a great day!

Karl
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Another New Beginning

Wow, two posts in the same day!  Aren’t we lucky?

I am proud and excited to announce the opening of my newest business, a hypnotism practice focused on helping people stop smoking, gain control of their weight, reduce stress, and more.  Our first office will be in Plainfield, IN, just 15 minutes from the beautiful, new Indianapolis International Airport.  We will occupy a small suite in the latest Yeager Properties office building on US 40, just east of Perry Road.

This has been a long, hard fought road for me, and I am eager to get going.  Those who know me well know that my greatest passion is helping others realize their dreams, to show them how powerful they really are, and to show them how to unleash that power to create joy and balance in their lives.  When I see a light-bulb go off in someone’s head, my heart sings.

Indiana has the strictest regulations in the nation for the practice of hypnotism, requiring licensure and certification by the State (under the Hypnotism Committee of the Medical Licensing Board) unless exempt by law or otherwise licensed as a health care professional.  For those of you who want to consult with a hypnotist, your chances of finding a well trained and dedicated professional are greater in Indiana than elsewhere.  I am licensed and certified by the State of Indiana and am a certified member of the National Guild of Hypnotists.  I began studying NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) in the late 1980s and have studied hypnostism for several years, most recently at the Hypnotism Academy of Indiana where I completed the educational and training requirements needed in order to even be approved to sit for Indiana’s Certification Exam.  Yes, I passed and am fully licensed and certified by the State of Indiana.

If you came here from one of my web sites, you likely know all this already.  If you have stumbled upon this page, you might find it of interest to visit Z-Success.com to learn more.

Thank you for visiting, and I look forward to hearing from you!

Happy Trances,

Karl

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It Will Be Over Soon & New Beginnings

Greetings, once again!  It seems that each time I write, I first apologize for my lengthy absence – let this suffice.

The election is almost here, and I am thrilled about that.  I think we have two impressive people to choose from, though I am not particularly eager to vote for either.  Senator McCain is a true hero who has served this nation with courage and commitment, but I think the Republican Party is out of touch with the country, and I don’t like some of their policies and positions.  Senator Obama is an inspirational choice, a highly intelligent and thoughtful man, and I am strongly opposed to some of his positions.  The negative campaigning by both sides is fully distasteful to me, and even though many experts say it comes with the territory, I find that a lame excuse for being disrespectful and contrary to any sense of decent behavior.

Perhaps a great way to regain some civility in the process may be to go back to creating a coalition; the person who wins becomes president, and the person who comes in second becomes vice-president.  They would be forced to work together, to cross the divide in Congress, to work for the country rather than their party.

I put my faith in the balance of power and trust that whatever happens, it will be for the best.  I actually think the president has less power than we would like to think, so it may not matter that much, though I do believe that when the same party has the majority and holds the White House, the pendelum can swing rather far to one side, and that is likely not great for the overall good.  I won’t bore you being specific about the issues with which I take issue, but let me just say that I like certain things about each ticket and certain things about each ticket I do not like.  For most of us, I believe, we will be making a choice based on those issues we hold most dear.  That makes sense, though I also believe we must consider those issues that have the greatest impact on our nation and the world, not just those that are near and dear to our own hearts.

So on November 4, 2008, I will cast a ballot, and I have yet to know for whom it will be.  There are good reasons to vote for either, and no matter for whom you cast your ballot, take pride in standing up for what you believe and for taking part in this historic election.

Please write with any comments.  I always enjoy hearing from you!

All the best,

Karl

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A Midlife Crisis or Coming Full Circle – The Latest News

Greetings:

This could be a long story, so I won’t give you all the details. Suffice to say that I have completed a journey that in some ways began more than 35 years ago. I find myself ready to embark on a new chapter in which I will be doing something that has followed me and tugged at me and called me for all these years. It is something I feel I am here to do. Even though I became interested in it in high school and wanted to head in its direction, many things, people, and decisions took me to different places and along different paths.

I have no regrets, as those who know me will understand. Even though my life has not always been easy or joyful, and even though it has taken more than 35 years to get here, I have learned from all of my experiences, and I am happy with the way I turned out. I think I’m a pretty good guy. I am, after all, “The boy who grew up to RULE® the world.”

Perhaps this new chapter is also the culmination of my having been “tapped” on the shoulder sometime in the mid 90’s when I was a CEO. A document crossed my desk, anonymously, and it read,

“For every man there comes that special moment when he is physically tapped on the shoulder and offered the chance to do a very special thing – unique to him and fitted to his talents.

What a tragedy if that moment finds him unprepared or unqualified for the work which would be his finest hour.”

It came at a very difficult time in my life, but I knew it was right. I knew that the time had come. I believe that this next chapter of my life is that “special thing.” At about the same time I was “tapped” by that document, someone told me that it seemed amazing to see people walk into my office who were angry or sad, but they would always walk out with smiles on their faces and their heads held high. That remains one of the most meaningful comments anyone has ever told me, and it has helped carry me through some of the rougher patches of my life and has given me direction.

So what is all this about? I am now a Licensed Certified Hypnotist by the State of Indiana, which has the strictest requirements for that profession in the country. I now get to use my skills to help people live more joyful, successful lives. I am so excited! As you may remember, one of the adages of RULE® is “Love yourself and others and everything you do.” Well, I love it! So it is not a midlife crisis. I have come full circle.

I will be sharing more with you about opening my practice, lessons learned, and helpful ideas that you can apply or share with others who may benefit. As always, I welcome your comments and suggestions. We are all in this together. Thank you for your support and kindnesses throughout this journey.

All the best, always!

Karl

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Ethics, Common Decency, or Are we asking too much?

Greetings All:

I know, it has been a long time since I’ve written.  I will not feel guilty, however, because I have been really busy, and if you really cared, you’d have written to ask me if I was okay.  :)

 
That being said, isn’t it amazing that there are people out there we trust and respect because of the credentials they have or the positions they hold, and they turn out to be just like any other person who lies, cheats, manipulates, and otherwise violates the most common rules of ethics and decency?  I am really amazed at that, and perhaps that is more a sign of my naiveté or idealism than a sign that there is somehow a shift in the statistical probability that some people with “respected credentials and positions” are really nothing more than liars and cheats.

 
Case in point:  Three doctors connected with Harvard have been found to have lied about money (more than $1 million each over the past several years) that they received from pharmaceutical companies for consulting in connection with certain studies of medications used in the treatment of various psychological conditions (including bipolar disorder).  An oversight?  Perhaps it was pocket change and they just forgot.  Sorry, I don’t think so. Read more about the above and the latest developments, here: PsychiatricGroup Faces Scrutiny Over Drug Industry Ties

 
There is a really cool open-air mall near where I live.  One of our favorite restaurants is there, a huge Rave Motion Pictures theater, and some wonderful shops, including Victoria’s Secret, Ann Taylor LOFT, PacSun, Starbucks, Dick’s Sporting Goods, Coldwater Creek, and many others.  Everything is nicely done, they provide shuttles and valet parking, and it is just a great place to go.  Recently, they’ve pulled back on some of the services.  It seems the guy who founded the company and was it’s CEO liked fancy cars, big houses, and several other luxuries, but he ended up violating some basic rules of business leadership.  He used company funds to fund his lavish lifestyle and failed to pay creditors and others who helped him grow his business. Sound familiar? All too!

 
A recent investigation by the BBC reveals some 70 court cases in the US that are not being reported by the news media because of a “gag order” by the Bush administration (censorship, anyone).  The cases are related to more than $23 billion that has been either diverted, stolen, overcharged, or otherwise improperly accounted for in the war in Iraq.  Halliburton, one of the companies involved, is reported to have quoted on a contract worth $7 billion for which they were the only company to quote (or allowed to quote).  Yes, they got the contract.  That is the very same Halliburton investigated for a variety of issues whose chairman was Dick Cheney prior to his becoming Vice President.  Yes, there is more to the story, but that will do for now.

 
Is it just greed?  I think it is more than that.  I think it is fear.  Perhaps that is too simple, but I really think it boils down to fear.  Greed might simply be the fear that if they don’t get “it” in whatever way they “have to,” then they won’t get “it” at all.  And if they don’t get “it” at all, then they believe (and are afraid others will believe) that they are failures.  It reminds me of a couple articles I wrote for business publications a few years ago, one of which was about the “Dog eat dog world of business.”  For more, check my earlier post. The short of it is that we create a world represented by what we believe.  In some cases, there may actually be some more deeply rooted, psychologically based issues, but that is for someone else to discuss.

 
It seems to me that people who continue to live their lives based in fear and the related attitudes of greed and competition will continue to destroy what they have built, including the relationships with those who supported them on their way to fulfilling their dreams.  I have compassion for them because they don’t know any other way.  On the outside, they seem to have everything, but on the inside, most of them are likely empty, always chasing something external in the hope that it will bring them more fulfillment, more joy. Until they learn the lesson, the chase will continue, unfulfilled.

 
One of the presuppositions of NLP (neurolinguistic programming) is, “There is no failure, only feedback.”  What might the people I mentioned earlier have accomplished if they knew they could not fail?  What will you do knowing that you can do nothing less than succeed?

Wishing you all the best!

Karl

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The Lessons We Learn and Other Pleasures

Greetings All:

Please excuse my absence.  I have been busy with travel and work (travel and work).  I am  pursuing additional study in order to provide additional services to my clients.  More on that another time.

A dear friend of mine has learned she has stage 3 breast cancer, and as can be expected, she is dealing with it the way most do – with anger and fear and uncertainty and determination and strength.  She is brave and strong, and sometimes she allows herself to scream and cry.   I think it is in that allowing that she really finds her strength.  If we stuff our fear and anger, it festers and grows into physical manifestations of fear and anger, like a cancer.  Think the metaphor is coincidental?  Not!

My dear friend has an amazing group of friends all around the world, many of whom have dealt with what she is going through and can offer a wealth of advise from their own experience.  The common thread I read in the many e-mails being sent back and forth and all around is that it isn’t what happens to us that matters but how we deal with what happens that counts.  It isn’t the stuff that we deal with but how we come out of it on the other side of having dealt with the stuff.  It isn’t in wondering, “Why me” that we find answers.  It is in the dealing with, the moving through and forward, and in the growing as humans and souls from our experiences.

I am grateful for all the lessons I have learned.  Many have been difficult and painful.  I am still working through some of them, finding the lessons.  It is in looking back and seeing how I grew and in seeing the lives I was able to touch in a positive way that I am most grateful.  I am blessed to be here, now.  There were days when I wasn’t sure I’d make it – when I wasn’t sure I wanted to or even could.  I’m glad I stuck around.  It allowed me to know you.

Blessings to all,

Karl
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Following the RULE®

Welcome back to Talk to Karl:

For those who don’t know about RULE®, you have come here at the right time.  For those who do know about RULE®, you know that you always choose the right time.

I came up with RULE® several years ago in an attempt to help guide people to live a more joyful and fulfilling life.  It may sound rather ambitious of me, but then, I usually set my sights rather high.

When people follow RULE®, they notice their lives becoming richer, more joyful, less stressful.  They notice people around them being happier, too. How can this be true – it sounds too good to be true.

Actually, it is based on a Universal Law that has gotten a great deal of press in recent months.  It is based on the same Universal Law that is revealed in “The Secret,” which is the Law of Attraction. Basically, the Law means that what we concentrate on is what we attract into our lives.  So if we are always mad and fearful, we will attract others who are the same.  We will attract things into our lives that support our beliefs (e.g. that people are bad, that others can’t be trusted, that bad things happen to us, etc.).

RULE® stands for Respect, Understand, Love, and Enjoy.  It is so simple, I call them “The Four Simple Steps.”  Go to my web site,  RULE® to learn more.

Thank you for visiting.  I look forward to your comments.

All the best,

Karl

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The Path Less Traveled

Wow, I can’t believe it has been this long – well, yes I can.  I just can’t believe I took this long to write another post. I have been so busy with school and travel that I have been remiss in keeping  you all up to date, and I am sorry.  I won’t “tell all” today, but I did want to let you know that I hadn’t abandoned my blog.  I drive up to Merrillville, near Chicago, on Monday mornings for school Monday afternoon and evening, spend the night, attend school Tuesday, and I drive back home, arriving fairly late.  Wednesdays are “take care of Karl” day – I go to the chiropractor, exercise with my personal trainer, have meetings with clients and friends, and run any errands I need to.  Thursday mornings I drive back up to Merrillville for school and return late Thursday night.  Friday is a day of catching up, attending meetings with clients and any Board meetings. I will tell you more about what I’m doing, later.  For now, please understand that I haven’t forgotten about you.  You can write me anytime and I will respond as soon as possible, usually within 24 hours.  If you need anything sooner, call me.Have a wonderful holiday! Karl comments@talktokarl.com