If you are a parent, you have undertaken to do the most important, challenging, and rewarding job anyone can ever have. It is likely that you have had days when you wondered what in the world you got yourself into. Have you ever thought that you weren’t going to make it as a parent or that you weren’t doing a good job? Did you ever wonder how your children would turn out considering the mistakes you thought you made?
If you are a typical parent, chances are there have been times when you wondered whether you were really cut out for that job and if your kids would be okay. What I believe is that you have done a good job, and if your kids are still at home, you continue to do the best you can at all times. Chances are that you have actually done a pretty darn good job.
Even though there isn’t an instruction manual for raising children, and even though we swore we wouldn’t make the same mistakes our parents made with us, we have instilled certain character in our children that, though they may not always exhibit it, will serve them well as they grow into adulthood.
A teacher of mine who practiced Family Counseling for decades shared with me that when parents came to her with a “problem child,” she would meet with them all, then the child, but she would spend more time with the parents in counseling sessions. In business we know that culture is a top-down phenomenon. The same holds true for families. The most important part of our job as parents is to allow our children to be who they are (not to mold them into some facsimile of ourselves or to be their friends) and to teach them to be caring and responsible adults.
You have in you everything you need to make good decisions, and it is most likely that, especially related to your children, your decisions have been, overall, good ones. In doing “the right thing” by your children, they will grow up to be good adults. When your children accomplish something that brings them great joy and you beam with pride, remember that you really did do a great job. How cool is that?